who am I on the 9 X 12 screen?

I thought I was a low-key working stiff who enjoys writing, nature, and urban living. Part of “work” is checking my e-mail. And when I log onto it I start to feel like several different people. 

To Marissa, a former co-worker, I’m someone waiting to read “feel good” messages that need to be forwarded to ten people so I’ll experience good luck or save a dying child. She had been sending clip art of a cute little laughing panda with every e-mail. Deaf to my e-warning, “I hate that cute little panda,” she persisted. So I e-mailed her that I’d printed out her panda on paper and then run it through the shredder on slow speed while squeezing ketchup on it. Her response included a curse that would finish off a dying child and now she sends two of those laughing pandas with every e-mail.  

Judie in Arizona reaches out to me and other fellow “Forwards” with messages that remind us, humorously, about the negative side effects of aging, and that we as Boomers are at the center of it. She’s also the personification of Anti-Hillary, with an arsenal of political satire surpassing Rush Limbaugh’s. 

Joe’s an old high school buddy. Fisherman. Hunter. Gun owner. Appreciator of the female body. I probably know more about new guns on the market than most Americans. I’ve cautioned him that when he sends his “softer” material he needs to code it so I don’t open it in the office at the wrong time. 

Bob lives in the woods in a trailer near the Florida-Georgia border. Another high school friend. His trip from “then” to “now” included a stint in Vietnam. Bob’s experimenting with grape growing, jewelry making, and assorted home repair projects. He sends me regular updates on his works-in-progress, including photos, detailed descriptions of working with molten silver, and a treatise on why he won’t expand to a double-wide – all intertwined with his observations on society. A politically correct local news commentator he’s not! 

Sometimes I don’t want to shut down the computer at the end of the day.

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2 Comments on “who am I on the 9 X 12 screen?”

  1. Joseph Belle-Isle Says:

    Bob only did one tour in the zone but your almost right on about everything except the fact that he’s not politicly correct. Just because the dumbass jitterbug media monkeys spew jive axxed horse hockey- designed to kiss up to limp wristed fudge packing worms that come here to hide from fighting for freedom rather than earn it the way we did and basicly ALL our revered politicians tell whatever lie is handy to get whatever fruitcake is listening to them to vote for them doesn’t mean that someone that points that out is politicly incorrect- It means the opposite. And Georgia patriots are fully aware that our system is designed so that no President has any idea where his buisinesses or their profits are coming from and it is virtually impossible to have a crooked politician. So lay off the theiving bastards.

  2. Mary Says:

    And who are you when my rambling emails come through venting about any various topics from my life, to why bike shorts should be black for men, to various Post-it notes I leave for your consideration, etc.? There isn’t a pill big enough for dealing with my electronic stalking and yet you do. Emails have become like hand-written letters of way back when – you get one and you are excited to read what it says, chomping at the bit to open it, skimming through the first read then reading it again slowly to take it all in. Except for it’s not on paper, it’s on a screen. Unless you take the time to print it. I like hand-written letters better. I have an entire folder full of them at home 🙂

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