Telemarketer from Hell: Part I

As a professional resume writer, I interview people daily who are changing jobs. Running a resume service for twenty years is a little like running a corner store or a funeral home; eventually everyone comes through your door. In addition to all the “normal” jobs you can think of, I’ve interviewed comedians, a psychiatrist, a police sniper, and a sewer worker from an industrial park who boasted, “No one there knows the insides of those sewers like I do!”

One man played the organ for four different churches every Sunday. He said, “It’s pretty much church and drive, church and drive…”

I’ve built a referral base and now interview people from all over the world, by phone: an Oil Ministry employee in Qatar, a liquor executive from The Netherlands, a female prison guard from Ontario, Canada, and a mechanical engineer in the Philippines. His address was “second road past the building supply store.” I convinced his sister, sitting across the desk from me – and paying for the $60 phone call – that he needed an e-mail address.

I thought I’d interviewed someone from every possible job until recently I found myself sitting face-to-face with…drum roll…a telemarketer. Not someone who’d merely had a telemarketing job, but someone who’d been a telemarketer his entire adult life – 15 years. One of those people I’ve wished I could electrocute through the phone line. But he was my customer, here, not my adversary. Or so I thought.

He’d worked for a company selling real estate investment training packages, including the Trump Investor Training Program. The packages were $1,300 to $1,900. To me, paying someone to show you how to buy a double house sounds bogus. Apparently it did to many of his customers; a large part of his job was convincing people to keep making their monthly payments. He said he was a good persuader. Basically, he was selling smoke, then coercing people to make their payments once they figured it out.

His business ethics, I would find, spilled over into his personal life. I got just a taste of this in the beginning. He missed one appointment and arrived late for the other two, smelling of hard liquor. He’d gotten a ride to my office from someone who apparently wasn’t too happy about it. “They’re outside waiting – gotta go,” he said, rattled. I thought it odd that someone who claimed to earn $65K had to bum a ride.

Next post: This telemarketer just won’t go away!

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2 Comments on “Telemarketer from Hell: Part I”

  1. jen Says:

    Hmm…Is this little item going to have a happy ending where you find his soul and he spends the rest of his life doing good on earth?


  2. Sometimes a Resume writer just has to do the ethical thing, and give a guy a resume that insures he NEVER gets a job again. This could be your chance! And do not blink as you take his money.


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