Women and stores

“This came from Ann Taylor,” the waitress says, removing a pair of jeans from a bag behind the counter and holding them up for the other waitress to see. I gleen from more bits of conversation that this Ann Taylor is not running around without her jeans. Ann Taylor is apparently not an actual person, but a store.

“Eighty bucks?” the second waitress asks increduously.

Probably a higher-end store.

“I’ve got to go there, myself, one of these days,” the second concedes.

Woman are funny about stores. The identity or concept of ‘Ann Taylor’ is nowhere in my manual of operating terminology. It’s like an obscure female body part that only women and precocious girls know about. Stores – other than hardware – are an extension of the female body. And shopping is a higher form of phsyical, emotional and intellectual pleasure than sex or being born again. You don’t need a partner, you can repeat it as often as you like, and it makes you feel good. This is what I’ve been told, anyway; I wouldn’t even know where to find Ann Taylor.

As I review those on my side of the counter – all men (HVAC contractor, plumber, attorney, flooring/carpet installer, telephone answering service operator, and me) – I don’t feel alone. I sense this shopping ‘high’ is not accessible to most of us men.

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One Comment on “Women and stores”

  1. Joseph Belle-Isle Says:

    My wife answers this for me all the time. It’s not that women are funny about stores. She says she likes to go shopping even if it’s just looking around and because I don’t she says, “There’s something wrong with you! All you men!” Psychiatrists point out that their brains work different. I take that as scientific proof that they are nuts. But I have learned to not point that out. Not very often anyhow. Besides when she’s in the store she’s not here asking me why I’m not like other men. You know- all of us that just love to go to the mall and look at stuff we can’t afford. Like the women at the mall.

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